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Agent Bungle's Diary

2 May 2011

Hello Agent Bungle here. I came up with this great idea the other day for faking the death of Usama Bin Ladin in Pakistan right near to a big military Academy and in a mansion. Hopefuly nobody noticed that he was killed years ago as Benazir Bhutto said


Now we have an excuse to invade Pakistan. I even figured out that we... could say he was buried at sea so there was an excuse for not having a the body. If I can pull this one off perhaps they will give me my job back. Don't forget, don't tell anyone else.

Yours falsely,

Special Agent Bungle.

P.S. Now some guy stormed into my office just now and says "Bungle! You F***ed it up again. First you shot Bin Ladin and we wanted him for questioning because he knows one hell of a, lot that would have been obvious to any agent but you bungle", and he went on, "and given that you have disposed of the body we can't even check the identity of the blighter you and your team of incompetents killed, and as for your statements about burial at sea in the Muslim tradition. How many bloody Muslims do you know that have been burred at sea for God sake Bungle."

Well! I have to say after fixing an excuse to go into Pakistan I was pretty upset. I did explain that it was a setup and that Bin Laden died years ago but he still looked pretty dumbfounded. Stormed out of my office! Well!

The next thing I hear is Ubama announced the whole thing to the public. Yes the president himself took it on. Well I guess they wouldn't of believed it from anyone less.

Well you know what I always say - A lie is as good as the truth if nobody finds out. I'm feeling a bit edgy about this one though now.

Mmmmm lets see. I know we'll put out some conspiracy theories that sound even dumber "The guy we killed was a KGB agent pretending to be Bin Laden" then when people say we didn't kill Bin Laden we can put them in the same pot as the people arguing as to whether it was a KGB Agent. Oh I feel better already. Thank God most people are so stupid.

Yours falsely,

Special Agent Bungle.

30 March 2011

Hi, special agent Bungle here. Now this is my plane. So far we have gone into Libya at high speed for "humanitarian reasons". Geddafi has to understand that killing innocent Arab civilians is exclusively the prerogative of the west. So the plan is that we first get in there on the pretext that we are helping the rebels against an oppressive dictator but then later we switch saying that most of the rebels had al-Qaida links. Clever hu. Then we install a government of our choice perhaps even a democracy. It should be fairly easy to rig the election after all. I have already started work on this because I'm not sure if the public will swallow this one so I am preparing the way by having the Radio raise the subject of al-Qaida just to make sure its in the public mind. This means when the switch happens it won't be to much of a surprise. Now I must tell you all, that this is TOP SECRET so please don't tell anyone else. Hopefully this operation will get me in the clear again. Ever since I did that Julian Assange smear campaign and turned Wikileaks into a household name, I have felt that my career has been, well how should I put it, reviewable. Yours Truly, Special Agent Bungle

A driver in the Libya story could be the threat to the Fed dollar as the global reserve currency.
It's reported by an Aftonbladet blogger that the Libyan leader was switching his standard for oil payments from Fed dollars to gold.
The day oil is no longer traded globally in USD, the Fed's toilet paper will go down the pan, and with it - the US economy.
But now the US forces are easing off the gas - perhaps a deal has been done on both the oil supply and the currency of choice.
With Obama first to the exit, Cameron and Sarkozy could be the fall guys.

© Tom de Havas 2011. The information under this section is my own work it may be reproduced without modification but must include this notice.